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  • Writer's pictureLauren Alexander

Lagom - Top Tips To Incorporate Within Your Wedding

[Pronounced Lahh-gom]

Swedish word

- It is all about balance.

-just the right amount, not too much not too little -

Weddings are not really that balanced. Whether it is you taking on more of the workload than your partner, or perhaps you have come to the last few months of your wedding, and up until now you have been rather relaxed, but now the final part of the wedding planning process is far more exhausting and full-on. Although we are planning the happiest day of our lives, not many people actually claim they are happy within the process. Sweden is consistently rated in the top 10 of the happiest countries in the world, and we are around 23... Perhaps our balance between work and play is a little bit off?

It possibly stems from the Viking term 'Lagert-om' - which translates to 'around the team' and they believe this derived from the Vikings would pass a horn of mead around the team, and there was 'just enough' to have a bit.

Admittedly when researching this term and this mindset in the realm of weddings - I found that weddings in the form of lagom were very paired back. Intimate lunches where the bride, groom, parents and handful of friends gathered in a simple restaurant or pub. No fanfare, no fuss and as such considered 'just enough'. Excess waste and excess spending is a little frowned upon, not necessarily foregoing luxuries but about having just enough for you.

Lagom is about creating a relaxed and above all balanced way of life. Knowing when to stop, using that self-restaint that we often don't have when it comes to wedding planning and styling. There are so many aspects to this particular philosophy that may not work with your wedding, or indeed with our life within the UK, however there are some features of this lifestyle to consider when it comes to decision-making, relaxation and reducing stress within wedding planning as well as potentially considering those suppliers to work with. It is possibly just a buzzword, but perhaps there are a few things we could use especially around a hectic time in our lives.

A few takeaways from Lagom -Find balance for your mind, body and planning process as well as your relationship with yourself, your partner and family and friends -Finding time for you - putting aside time for you along the way and not feeling guilty is so important to feeling grounded and keep your head above the waves. -Nothing is perfect. Lagom is the perfect antidote to a perfectionist lifestyle - it is a useful tool to guard against perfectionism which can then draw you back to the now, to reality and will hopefully remind you to not cry if your candles don't burn at the same time. (This has happened!) -Don't over-exhaust yourself, and don't procrastinate - be balanced and use your time effectively. -Digital Detox- remove yourself from social media for a while, put the phone down and interact with yourself and those around you rather those online. -Pause before you do something - really take a moment, take a breath and consider routes before you jump in and say yes to something, and really consider if it is something you either want, or have time to do. -However going too Lagom... it could still or stop you, perhaps make you think too much about going over the top. Sometimes it is exciting to go a little over the top!

Top Wedding Tips To Utilise Lagom in Your Wedding Style & Day: 1. Utilise your friends and inner circle - your friends have so many talents so use these! Flowers, make up, photography, whatever it could be, bring them into your day and you can cut the budget, but also spread out the responsibility. 2. The Dress: Vintage and second-hand dresses not only come with a smaller price-tag but also some fabulous history. You can recreate your dream styles, at lower prices as well with some of the high-street companies. A few alterations after the day means you could even reuse the dress for an everyday occasion. 3. Hair: Relaxed hair, simple up-do or a half-up is so beautiful but also so simple. You can do it yourself, or perhaps a talented friend could help? Adding a touch of summer or autumnal flowers and foliage into a plait or perhaps a cute floral crown or comb can add a sense of occasion. 5. The Suit: Renting instead of buying is often less expensive, but again reusing a suit you have may be a great option. Bring it back to life with a beautiful new tie, pocket square and buttonhole. 6. Venue: This is often where your budget needs to be as well as tends to get eaten up. Depending on your vibe, lakes, forests, farms and the beach all create beautiful backdrops just as much as a grand stately home. Perhaps you could look into an Airbnb cottage or house nearby, as well as a village hall or garden to reduce budget. Ask guests to bring umbrellas, and wellies (and have fun not worrying about it!)

7. Table Settings: Don't worry about everything looking perfect, mismatched chairs, flowers in jam jars, ribbons, twinkling candles - it is more important for Lagom style weddings that everyone has a full glass, some tasty food and great company. Minimalism and keeping things naturally simple is key and this can be replicated using the outdoors environment for your decorations. 8. Suppliers: Working with suppliers who also have the same ethos as you is important. Making sure they listen to you and your budget, not pushing you into something you don't want as well as getting back to you as quickly as possible is key to balance and remaining in control and stress-free. Making sure that they are responsible, eco-friendly and sustainable is key to a Lagom wedding so always chat with them in terms of how they minimise damage to the environment. But most important, it is all about balance. Feeling like you are happy, your partner is happy and that the wedding isn't drowning you - whether that is asking for help along the way, or giving others jobs to do, you can keep the balance with Lagom. What do you think? Is this something you would incorporate in your wedding journey?

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